In the early days of my first pregnancy, I stumbled across the idea of Sleep Training. The first method I was introduced to (by this I mean I was a huge Facebook creep), was one that did NOT include “crying it out” or “controlled crying”.
Instead, it was about knowing the 5 different baby personalities, and which type of baby you were blessed with. I was intrigued. Being very “Type A”, I wanted guidance in child rearing.
Never having looked into the topic of sleep training before, when I found a second-hand copy of The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems, by Baby Whisperer, Tracy Hogg + Melinda Blau, I jumped at the chance to learn more about the different baby personalities.
I started reading “The Book” (as my fellow Hogg-followers call it), and finished it in record time, before the birth of my Sweet Girl. I even went back and made notes and cheat sheets to refer to in the newborn days (honestly, those looseleaf pages got a lot of wear!).
Now, with 2 babies in our home, not a month goes by where I don't flip through The Book. I've given it as gifts, purchased sequels, and referred many a desperate friend to the heaven-sent words of The Baby whisperer.
Its value is unmeasurable, especially after battling overwhelm with 2 under 2.Sweet Girl was sleeping through the night at 3 weeks old, after being on a routine for 5 days. Pip took a bit longer (he was a really gassy baby, and caught a cold at 3 weeks old that lasted for 3+ months), he started sleeping through around 2.5 months old.
If you're unfamiliar with the works of Tracy + Melinda, I highly recommend checking out The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems. I've gone ahead and made a bit of a list regarding what their core values are in terms of child rearing.
- Gentle + positive parenting
- NO “crying it out” or “controlled crying”
- Swaddling
- Waking to feed
- Structured ROUTINE, vs schedule
- Learning specific tools to communicate with your unique baby to create a happy environment for the whole family
- Start as you mean to go on
- Listening to, understanding and knowing your child; understanding there are different baby personalities
- Be patient and conscious
If you remember, I mentioned in my last email that I was working on, yet another, wake-to-sleep campaign with Pip, and that I'm kicking off a Sleep Training Series this week.
- See Week 2, How to Sleep Train the EASY Way, here
- See Week 3, Accidental Parenting, here
- See Week 4, Shush-Pat Method, here
- See Week 5, Pick Up/Put Down, here
- See Week 6, Wake to Sleep, here
When the general public hears the term “Sleep Training”, they're going to think of crying it out. It's not always the case, and it's important to set that record straight! There's more to sleep training than the night-time sleep habits.
I can't emphasize this enough. Sleep training is about:
- Proper eating and sleeping habits (times, lengths, rituals)
- Structure, kids need structure more than anyone
- Respect
- Listening to, understanding and knowing your unique baby by knowing where she fits in to the different baby personalities.
Over the next 6 weeks you're going to learn about, what I feel, are the most important tools for parenting different baby personalities. The outline is as follows:
Week 1 – Intro + Different Baby Personalities
Week 2 – E.A.S.Y. Routine
Week 3 – Accidental Parenting
Week 4 – Shush-Pat Method
Week 5 – Pick Up/Put Down
Week 6 – Wake-to-Sleep Method
One thing I'd like to mention before we get too far along is this:
“Anything you're struggling with as a parent is usually your fault. Babies only do what they've been taught. If there hasn't been guidance or teaching, how can you expect your infant to do what you want him to?!”
Here's the real story: the first thing to know is the different baby personalities, and where your sweet child fits in.
Look, you know all people are different. You even notice the differences in kids, but have you ever thought about how one baby differs from another. I mean really thought about it? Just as there are varying characteristics among adults and kids, there are also different baby personalities.
So what does this mean for you and your baby, in terms of sleep training?
The most important part of sleep training and, dare I say, parenting, is knowing your baby. If you don't know what triggers your baby has, what sets him off on a crying spell, how quick she is to lose her temper, or what he needs to settle down, you're never going to succeed. Too harsh? Bear with me.
Different baby personalities require different types of nurturing.
Here's what you need to know:
- No two babies are exactly the same, not even twins
- You cannot change the type of baby you have
- It's imperative to embrace the baby you've been given and create a safe, loving and nurturing environment for her
- By tuning in to your unique baby and his needs, you'll have a closer bond and be better able to avoid meltdowns, tantrums, and misbehavior
Now that you know how important it is to learn the different baby personalities, you actually need to find out what type of baby you have!
Tracy Hogg has split children into 5 different categories based on their temperaments, and different baby personalities.
But there's a catch.
- Your baby can fit perfectly into one type, or can be a mixture of a few. One day he might be more of a grump, the next he could be textbook.
- The determining characteristics are never going to be exact.
- These categories are not meant to be labels, but rather guidelines for getting to know your baby better.
So what are the five different baby personalities??
Angel Baby
Angel babies easily adapt to new situations and environments. They take change in stride, rarely cry without cause, and are simple to read. Easy going, even-tempered, and good sleeper are terms often used to describe angel babies.
Eating – love to eat, open to trying new foods if given the opportunity
Activities – moderately active. Play independently. High tolerance for change. Social, like to interact, good at sharing (unless overwhelmed by another child's aggressiveness).
Sleep – goes to sleep easily on her own. Sleeps long stretches by 6 weeks. after 4 months will take a 2 hour nap in the morning, 1.5 – 2 hour nap in the afternoon, and (until about 8 months), a 30-45 minute nap in the early evening.
Mood – easygoing, upbeat, not extremely reactive. Steady + predictable. Easy to read.
Described as – Good as gold. Didn't even know we had a baby in the house. I could have 5 like him. We were really lucky.
*Note, our Sweet Girl is part Angel Baby. While others tell us we are lucky (all the time), I think most of it is the way we trained her through the teachings of the Baby Whisperer.
Textbook Baby
Milestones are met like clockwork for textbook babies, as the name suggests. They are predictable and show the signs that you see in the movies regarding teething, tiredness, hunger and more.
Eating – similar to Angel babies. Introduce foods a bit more slowly.
Activities – Moderately active. Everything on time, easy to choose appropriate toys. Some are more eager than others.
Sleep – Usually need a full 20 minutes to fall asleep (you can learn more about baby sleep patterns by purchasing The Book). May need a bit more time and calming if overstimulated.
Mood – low reactor. Fairly good-natured as long as someone pays attention to cues for hunger, sleep, etc.
Described as – She's righto on time with everything. She's mellow unless she needs something. Low maintenance child.
Touchy Baby
As you can guess, touchy babies are ultra-sensitive. They're high strung and easily excitable. It's important to introduce new things slowly. Touchy babies often cry randomly, and need perfect sleeping conditions. Certain professionals label them as “inhibited” and “highly reactive”.
Science shows that some babies have higher levels of cortisol and nor-epinephrine, causing them to experience feelings (ie. fear), more intensely. (Hogg, p.56)
Eating – easily frustrated, anything can upset desire to eat (flow, body position, room conditions). Can have trouble latching to a breast and developing rhythm. Balk at change, or if you speak too loudly. Will likely refuse solids at first (be persistent when he's showing signs of readiness).
Activities – cautious about new toys, situations, and people. Need a lot of support through transitions. Low activity levels, needing encouragement to participate. less sensitive in the mornings, better at one-on-one play. Avoid afternoon play dates.
Sleep – important to swaddle + block out stimulation. Do not miss the sleep window (read more about it here), it can then take twice as long to settle him down. Tend to sleep a longer nap in the morning, just a catnap in the afternoon.
Mood – sometimes cranky right from the delivery room (bright lights, noise). Highly irritable, very reactive, easily upset.
Described as – Crybaby. Slightest thing sets her off. Not good with other people. Always ends up in my lap or clinging to my leg.
Spirited Baby
Spirited babies are more prone to being aggressive + vocal. They tend to be poor(er) sleepers, have a low attention span, and throw fits more often.
These are powerful emotions for little ones, and, with the right guidance to channel their energy, can be great leaders. Some professionals label spirited babies as “aggressive”, “uninhibited”, “high energy”, or “highly reactive”.
Eating – similar to Angel. Can be impatient breast-feeders.
Activities – high energy, feisty, very active. Ready to jump into almost any situation. Little control or caution. Highly reactive, aggressive. More cooperative in the morning. Leave afternoons for winding down.
Sleep – hate being swaddled, but you need to block out visual stimulation. Resistant to naps and nighttime rituals (don't want to miss a thing, little Aerosmith nuts, they are). Shorter nap in the morning, longer in the afternoon (key to a good night's sleep for these ones).
Mood – when they want something, they want it NOW. Opinionated, vocal, stubborn. Quick mood swings. Love action, but tend to over do it, causing a tantrum, which is hard to stop once it's begun. Transitions can be rough.
Described as – A handful. Always into something. Don't have the energy to keep up with her. She's fearless.
Grumpy Baby
All of Tracy's categories are quite easy to understand, and this one is no different. Grumpy babies (grumps), have a mind of their own and feel the need to test their parents daily. Being stubborn, they'll maintain their own boundaries til the end of the world.
It's important not to push a grumpy baby; you'll end up worse off than when you started. Grumps will be challenging and offer few smiles.
They can be fidgety and irritable, and hate being swaddled. Keeping a routine is especially important for this type of baby.
Eating – impatient. Feeds can take a long time, which can overtire them. Don't easily adapt to solids and prefer the same foods over and over again.
Activities – lower activity level. Prefer to play alone, using eyes and ears more than body. Hate being interrupted. Find transitions from one toy to another hard.
Sleep – not easy. Often overtired because they're so resistant. Fuss themselves to sleep. Catnappers, sleeping in only 45 minute stretches (creating a vicious cycle, see pages 249-252 of The Book).
Mood – have to keep an eye on their emotional state. Ready to boil at any minute. Slightest variation in routine can set them off. Without a routine, life is turmoil. This baby will take over your life, if not nurtured properly.
Described as – Sourpuss. Prefers playing on his own. Always waiting for the next meltdown. Always has to have her way.
So you know what type of baby you have, now for the best part! I'm going to let you know how you can actually use this information!
By having the knowledge of your baby's type, you're going to be more confident in the decisions you make for her.
Maybe you have an Angel baby. You've been afraid to make any significant changes in fear of throwing out her routine. Fear not! You should cause minimal damage to your sweet little bundle by introducing a new food, moving rooms, transitioning from a crib or pack ‘n play to a big bed, or expanding your family.
I can totally vouch for this. When I became pregnant with #2, I was terrified of moving Sweet Girl to the next room, putting her in a big bed, and bringing Pip home. Every single transition was beyond uneventful.
Is your baby a Textbook baby? Go ahead and buy his next birthday or Christmas gift. You know what he likes. You can accurately guess what he'll be able to handle by that age. Just don't go comparing other kids to him, even though he'd be considered average.
Now that you know you have a Touchy baby on your hands, you'll know it's important to arrive at play group 5-10 minutes early to let her explore on her own and watch the kids come in to join her, versus showing up and throwing her to the lions.
Spirited babies are a curve ball! Sweet Girl has a lot of feistiness in her, too. It's important to channel that energy into productive projects. I know when she starts getting rambunctious and aggressive that it's time to remover her from the situation, give her some one-on-one time with me, and calm down.
If you have a Grump on your hands, don't worry. It doesn't mean he'll be a grumpy old man his whole life! It just means you're going to have to help him adjust to new situations and help him through transitions. It might feel like ages to you, but to him, it's huge leaps. Respect him and you'll find the whole family will be happier.
There you have it! You know what type of baby you have and how to gauge his temperament. Next week we're going to delve into the E.A.S.Y. routine and get you into a more structured and unified family lifestyle.
I'd love if you left me a comment! Tell me what type of baby you have (my Sweet Girl is Angel + Spirited – quite the combo). Don't forget to share, I really appreciate it! Follow me on Pinterest and Twitter, too!
- See Week 2, How to Sleep Train the EASY Way, here
- See Week 3, Accidental Parenting, here
- See Week 4, Shush-Pat Method, here
- See Week 5, Pick Up/Put Down, here
- See Week 6, Wake to Sleep, here
Recommended Materials
- Great Book
- Hogg, Tracy (Author)
- English (Publication Language)
Last update on 2022-09-12 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API