Sadly, sibling fighting is way too much of a common occurrence. Many kids adore each other at one point in time only to hate each other's guts the following day. It often results in name-calling and fighting.
With the constant exposure to violence that all of us experience, it may seem like fighting is the best problem-solving tool. However, it is far from it.
Almost every parent knows that violence is never the answer. Nonetheless, the real question is: how to pass this knowledge to another person, especially if it’s your child? What methods can you use to manage your kids fighting each other?
In this article, you find useful tips that will help you end any sibling rivalry. If your kids do not get along with each other, read on.
Try Separating Them
When adults get angry at someone, many of them decide to cope with their emotions alone. Sometimes this is also the way to go in the case of kids. After all, when we stop seeing someone towards whom we have strong feelings, we tend to get more rational.
If your children share the same room, use room dividers to give them personal space. This way, you will allow your kids to calm down.
Portable Partitions and similar online sites produce room dividers and privacy screens. With their help, you might stop any brewing conflict from exploding into a full-fledged fight.
Be a Positive Role Model
The writing technique called ‘show, don't tell' can be used for other aspects of life than writing. It can, for example, be useful in teaching your kids various values.
Whether you want it or not, your kids will “borrow” some behaviors from you. Children learn by example. If there is a tense atmosphere in your home, you should not be surprised by the outcome.
This fact means that parenting does not end with saying what is right or wrong. Being a wise parent demands from you to show it.
To teach your child that it should not hurt their brother or sister, you have to make sure that your behavior carries a positive impact. When your children see how you respond to problems, they might conclude on their own that their actions need to change.
Do not favor one child over the other. When your kids fight, one of the worse things that can happen is for them to think that you take sides. Parents are seen as judges in these types of situations, and everyone wants to be judged fairly.
Give every child some time to explain the situation. Remember to pay attention to both sides of the story. Work together with them to get to the bottom of things.
If you do this, your children will feel that they have been treated fairly. With a good judge at home, when one of the siblings has a problem with their brother or sister, they will address it with you instead of picking a fight.
Pat Them on the Back
Your children can be a source of a lot of problems, sure. However, they can also be responsible for many memorable moments. Do not be afraid to let them know they did something right.
You might tell them that you like seeing them play together or when they help each other. There are plenty of ways in which you can reward them for their efforts too.
Do not forget that everyone in your family needs to hear some nice words from time to time. If you want the fighting to stop, praise your kids’ deeds when they work together. You may be surprised at how far it can get you.
Let Them Work It Out Themselves
Even though not seeing the person we are arguing with can be beneficial, in some cases, the opposite approach can yield even better results. If you have an older child and feel like it can get along with their sister or brother without your help, then go for it.
Keep in mind that your kids can understand each other much better than you ever could. If you are the type of person who would intervene in every dispute, try to see how your kids can play disagreements out on their own. Sometimes, the best action is inaction.
The Bottom Line
In a family, everyone has to take care of one another. However, parents share the extra responsibility of teaching their kids to become decent people. This responsibility includes teaching conflict resolution skills.
After reading our tips, you will know what to do the next time you encounter sibling rivalry! Remember that you can stop your children from getting into fights by directing more of your attention towards them.
You can even make some rules they need to respect. Show them there are other ways to resolve a conflict without the need for sibling fighting. Parenting is not an easy thing.
However, if you will approach every conflict with calm and not let the feelings overtake you, everything should be well. Good luck!